A year ago today...

(continue reading from the title... just to warn you I do that a lot) My first serious boyfriend broke up with me. Now he'll tell you that he just tried to "take a break" from our relationship but who wants to take a break 4 months in? That's just dumb. We're not in junior high anymore. So when he finished talking and crying (and saying things like, "I talked to my sister and... I met you so soon after my ex.... I really like you....") I looked him stone cold in the eye and said, "We're not 'taking a break,' we are breaking up." To this statement, he looked surprised and I just said, "I know I haven't been in a relationship before but I don't want to do that. I've seen too many people in my life overly hurt by 'breaks' and I think it's stupid." Okay maybe I didn't say the "stupid" part but I sure as heck feel that way (I believe I said something along the lines of "it just doesn't work..."). I was also thinking how out of the blue it was. I mean the week before we celebrated Valentine's Day on the 15th (because one of my best friends was visiting me as per a previous post) and then I left for Paris on the 16th for a conference (it was actually the first global concession of pediatric health which is exactly what I want to do so there was no way I was missing it. And it was in Paris... so it's pretty obvious why I went). We talked the whole way through my trip (4 days) and ... okay anywho.

It may seem that I am not over it. And maybe a little part of me isn't? I mean he was the first guy that I thought, "Hey, I could see myself with him for a long while..." but honestly, the more and more I think about it (and we all know that hindsight is 20/20), the more and more I am absolutely, completely okay that we broke up. He only told me twice how he felt about me and both were at questionable times. Everything seemed forced from him. He didn't really care if other guys checked me out (okay so I know that one sounds whiny and very "girl" like but there were a more than a few times where he saw a guy check me out and joked about it and told me to go get his number or hit on him for a drink. AND twice one of his friends tried to kiss me when we were all out together and he was not in the least bit upset. Guys, seriously, is that not weird?!) which didn't bother me at first but makes me wonder now.

Any way, a year later I am single and loving it.

I tried dating around a bit (okcupid.com it was super fun and I recommend it! If you're willing to sift through creepy people and find the genuine folks) and it was helpful in that I found that there are decent people out there but now that I'm back in school and working part-time at my old clinic, I just won't have the energy. Which is fine. Honestly. I have plenty of people that I need/want to keep in touch with and this is a good time to restart my relationship with God too (I always feel like I can hear people groaning at that statement but it's true! So meh on you.)

To my friends who are married, in serious relationships, or are actively in the dating world, more power to you and I will pray for your success and ... things? Haha obviously I'm not too well versed in this but in any case, good juju is being sent out into the world for you by me (only if, of course, you want to receive it and make your relationship last).

To my fellow singletons, let us eat, drink, and be merry (I mean not that we have to be exclusive to those who aren't in our *coughexclusivecough* club but ya know we are responsible to only ourselves for the most part). Seriously. I'm taking a butt load of classes and will need some people to chill and relax with when the time comes. And it's coming. Soon. To a theatre near you. Okay maybe not the last part but you know what I mean.